I’m a little disappointed in the small amount of pot I brought home with me last weekend, but seriously proud of past me for having the self-control and foresight.
I’ll be getting more next weekend, btw. Future me will thank me again. (We love each other.)
Did I tell you I went to lunch with Gord the other day? I missed him. Having a crush is SO much more fun when you can’t act on it. =D
I told him if I knew he was the marrying kind I never would have pursued him like I did. We both laughed pretty hard at that.
Sometimes I foresee a day where people (and by people, I mostly mean me) will try to put all of my notes and journals and blogs and twitters together to try and create a timeline of my life for publication so I make little connections to prove they’re all me.
I also used to teach myself what life would be like if I was blind so throw a grain of salt on that last comment to give it a little more flavour.
I had a talking to at work today. My boss thought I was giving the maintenance guy shit during our meeting. And I had to admit I was. I apologized and agreed it wasn’t the correct venue. However, I needed to get his attention, I saw an opening and went for it. I spoke with him this morning, long before anyone else came in. He said he was getting pissed off because I mentioned some things that hasn’t been done but he had to admit it was true. I asked him to consider the benefit of having things ready to go when someone was ready to come in so it didn’t turn into a scramble. To be honest, the last few move ins a have been an absolute embarrassment and I had to speak up. I think he heard me. He knows I think a lot of him. I’m not being difficult or an asshole, I’m trying to make things better and I feel he sees that. I would never push him that far if I wasn’t confident of that. About an hour after we talked it out he came to my office to show me some pictures of a way we could rectify another issue we’ve been trying to solve and it was a really good idea, and he made an extra effort to do it. And that. Is what I’m talking about. I 💛 D’arcy and he 💛s me. =D
It’s so weird to step back into my old habit of stoner town like this. And I don’t feel an urge to run or hide or stay stoned forever. I’m smiling at the memory of the day, a year or so ago, when I thought I’d like to get stoned about once a month at my sister’s and bring a teeny bit back for me, so I could step back in time. That’s what I get to do now. And I waited a whole week (with the exception of a few puffs on Wednesday night, just for fun!) to smoke it. Until there was a day I could leave work early and enjoy it in the afternoon as is my favourite time. (But not on a weekend because I got shit to do!)
This is my own private little thank you, pat on the back, sigh of relief, moment to chat with future me and I honour it.
And fuck. Through it all, the years and years, I faltered more often than not. I believed and then I didn’t believe. I ran and I fell and I got back up over and over.
I’m most happy that I don’t feel I have to run anymore, so I’m excited to run again.
I don’t think Jeff saw me today. He’d be acting super dramatic online if he did. (It doesn’t have to be nice to be true, Mom.)
*I put an astrix with the last stoned post so I decided to do that here too. Not sure why, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
icm2bgr8 